The Ocean

Mandee wanted me to take her to the ocean today so we went to belmar and walked on the beach in the cold wind. I got my feet wet. It was good.

Then we drove through Asbury Park. It was sort of like driving through chernobyl. Four lane boulevards were completely empty of cars and buildings looked like they had been abandoned for years. This was contrasted sharply by the mansions of Deal, NJ. All this has shown is that I need to have several million dollars and sweet beach house.

The Medium gets national attention

The Medium has been caught in a national scandal. Looks like they took their poop jokes a little too far.

Last American Virgin, Part II

Tonight I decided to watch the second half of the last american virgin, which i started watching last night. There was loads more gratuitous nudity and even driving with an open container--amazing! But why I have taken this short break from the movie to blog is this: the lead female love interest has an abortion (in one of those white bread conservative anti abortion ways); this procedure is paid for by our hero, though he is not the father. He confesses his love for her in a tear jerking scene explaining he has loved since he first saw her (she was the new girl at school, its been what, a month?); finally after a single kiss, our hero eagerly shells out 80 dollars for a locket he says is for his girlfriend. Girlfriend? They kissed once, two days after she aborted the child of our hero's best friend. Bah! Of course, everything about this is ok when I think she is now forty something. Ha!

Free Speech undermined by big business.

A recent episode of the West Wing, the Press Secretary grappled with the issue of the FCC allowing television station operators to hold increasingly large shares of media markets.

In This article, it appears her character's fears are real; executives of a conglomerate that owns 7 ABC affiliate stations have given almost 10,000 to Bush-Cheney. They have then odered their affiliate stations to boycott an ABC network special that honors the over 500 soldiers killed in Iraq claiming they don't wish to politicize the war and "undermine" the efforts being made there. Or more accurately, undermine the President's foreign policy.

Isn't it time we realize there is no such thing as a liberal media?

Downstairs Neighbors.

The gents downstairs continually play their music at abnormally high levels. Right now I hear a faint rendition of Yellow Submarine. Later, I'm sure I will be graced with their pop music. At least the Mexicans next door don't have their usual spanish techno going.

I need to water my flowers.

For those not going to Graduate School

Ten Ways of Continuing the College Experience
without Entering a Graduate Program


10. Buy a book of poetry and pretend to have read it cover to cover. Six times.
9. Visit a public toilet and ask the gent next to you to pass a roll of toilet paper.
8. Start every third sentence with, "according to Sartre"
7. Mispronounce Sartre
6. Watch the Adam West Batman at four a.m. and pretend it's a legitimate excuse to sleep until noon.
5. Borrow money from your parents
4. Drink Tequila, without a chaser
3. Ask random people if they know where you can 'score' weed.
2. Play Mario Kart until your thumb cramps
1. Think about where your life is going and still have hope you will accomplish your life dreams.

Available at the Office Haiku site.

The Last American Virgin

I watched the first half of The Last American Virgin (1982) last night. Its like American Pie, but in the 1980's and with a lot more gratuitous nudity. It was amazing. And you absolutely cannot overlook the horrible 80's clothing. amazing.

5 pm. My head is stuff with mucus. I still have lots of fun times left in the office. Damn all of you who will enjoy another 5 years of academic life. I want to drink at 3 in the afternoon too.

Russians finally get it right.

After years of being technologically awkward (I love the Russians I know, but let's face it, the mother country is a few years behind the rest of the globe). Anyway, they have finally come up with a solution to Music Downloads.


Essentially, users download songs based on a per megabyte usage fee (roughly 7 cents a song), and then the files are prepared in any format the user asks for it. That is to say, I could still get it in MP3 if I wanted, or AAC if I was using an iPod. Under the restriction on copyrights, it supposedly is up to the user not to use the service if prohibited locally by your local government-- which is not, according to This Article because there are not laws against importing music. of course, the whole site could be a front for the russian mob, which means, bye bye credit rating.

But in either case, it really is the future of music downloads: cheap prices and any format.

MPAA President Jack Valenti gets it stuck to him.

Those crafty kids at MIT have just
stuck it to the man Jack Valenti. Read it all the way through. Its a brilliant interview.

Best Bloggers, Week of April 28

1. Peter
2. Erik
3. Patrick
4. Shawn
5. Cyriak
6. Tom
7. Clayton
8. Faraci
9. Clayton’s Mom

Summary:
This weeks field was marked by two trends; first, an overall improvement over last weeks blogs. Second, there was an overall dichotomy between the top half of the list and the lower half of the list. Those who were good were exceptional; the lower half failed in frequency and in quality. Clayton’s Mom has most notably suffered from this. She may very well be dropped from the list entirely.


1. Peter was propelled to the number spot with several factors in mind. First, consistency of making entries; he didn’t blog everyday but he didn’t make five entries in one day either. He also had diversity in content, citing links of interest (tracking blogs) and good dialogue. Overall a very enjoyable experience.

2. Erik dropped a spot this week, but not because of lack of improvement, but simply because this week offered extremely tough competition. I would like some additional entries from him regarding the drink—an obvious activity overlooked this week—and he was a little light over the weekend.

3. Patrick advanced one spot this week. His improvement lies with special emphasis on posting an intra-office email, for which alone last week would have given him the top spot; unfortunately the competition was nipping at his heals and peter and Erik were playing the part of the man and kept Patrick down.

4. Unfortunately for Shawn the competition was extremely tough this week and he was unable to advance. That being said there were a few weaknesses with his blog. First, what happened to the weekend? It seemed to this reader that the blog entries were weighted very heavily towards end of week postings; an attempt to manipulate his rankings? Perhaps. Additionally, holding back some critical information was a detriment, particularly considering Patrick’s choice to breach confidentiality of the nitwits he serves.

5. Cyriak’s main blog weakness was his sporadic entries. He does get props for producing a list, though no one took the bait and so no other lists turned up contradicting his. Good tidbits about his sister, but overall we needed more.

6. Tom, what happened? I would have liked an entry following up on the birthday party wish list—did you get any of the items? Was there a party? What did you do? Yet these questions remained unanswered and instead we are left with his googlism.

7. Clayton had a fairly pitiful entry about being to board to blog. I think he might manic depressive.

8. Faraci’s blog was equally pitiful. Has this guy ever been at the top of the list?

9. Clayton’s Mom might be cut entirely from the list next week. Faraci should be most concerned by this, since without her, he might be last.

Gmail Part 3

Its been 5 days since I got me Gmail account; there has been very little activity so far. I'm still puzzled as to where the ads are that I was eagerly expecting. I have to wonder, maybe as I recieve more email, they will come; two things about gmail though: no spam so far, while my hotmail account recieves at least 30 peices a day, or more. Second, gmail has sprouted wonderful amounts of blogging activity.

The Weekend in Review

Saturday:
Ag Field day was the usual sort of excitment; funnel cakes and fried foods filled me up and had some gin with tonic with Vanessa and Greg. Their Ag Field get togther was marginalized by several degenerates, one who referred to herself as "oh, I'm Emo" as an excuse for her tattoos. Indeed, If she really were emo, no explanation would be needed; besides, I don't believe in Emo. Eventually returned home and watched Seabiscuit, though i fell asleep in the last five minutes; Mandee refuses to tell me what happens.

Sunday:
Woke and went to the highland park street fair with Peter. Unlike garage sale day, which is what I thought it was, the street fair was fairly lame. I got a John kerry Pin though, and there was a seven year old with cowboy boots and a cowboy hat singing on the makeshift stage. I was confused by this. Then it started to rain and at that point Mandee and I wanted to head to the West Field Fair, at nick's request; it was apparently amazing. of course after a brief stop at old navy for socks (to keep Mandee's feet from getting cold) we wound up in Westfield post downpoor; the fair had ended. but we went to Trader Joes and got 3 dollar bottles of wine that are surprisingly easy to drink, and chicken / mushroom sausage that are amazing. mmmm.

Monday:
Rain causes havoc on the turnpike, and crawl along at 30 mph from New Bruinswick to Lyndhurst. Jesus fuck.